The Awakening of Seasons

In March, I spent a few days visiting my father in Florida. While there, the weather was the usual for Florida – some rain, a few sun rays, clouds, rain again, and lastly the sun decided to stay a while. During my three-day visit, I took time to think about what it was that God wanted me to learn or recognize in the moment. Between January and March, I began to lose who I was. Who God said I was. I began to question my own self-worth, which was something I had never done before. I began to allow the words of others (society, family, relationship gurus, etc.) to influence who God created me to be and doubt everything that He has told me. The pressure to be successful, have a family, fall in love, be perfect, don’t do this, don’t do that, began to make me think I had failed. On the last day of my visit, something hit me like a flood. Literally, at the most inconvenient time in my mind, but in God’s best timing, I was reminded that I was experiencing a series of seasons. And I mean S-E-A-S-O-N-S! ​I know we talk about seasons in the spiritual sense, but let’s look at them from what we all know about seasons. For many of us from the north, we are familiar with experiencing four seasons - winter, spring, summer and fall. In each season, there is a transition and transformation of some sort. Take plants for example. In the fall, plants begin to shed their leaves formed in the spring. As they shed their leaves, we get to enjoy the beauty and warmth of their colors and the tranquility of the autumn breeze and fresh aroma of the Autumn air. But as winter approaches, we begin to notice a chill sweeping over everything that was once beautiful. We see snow and ice in some areas, which is an indicator for some of us to prepare for hibernation. The winter time slows us down and we move with caution to stay safe. For plants, I feel like they hibernate as well. They shed their leaves to allow themselves to rejuvenate for the upcoming seasons. The work they put in from spring through fall requires a lot of energy from them and they need time to strengthen their roots to continue to be healthy. When spring arrives, the warm sun, the constant rain, and the cool breeze welcomes a renewing of life. The beautiful combination of rain and sun provides the necessary nourishment for plants to awaken renewed and revitalized. Their journey through the seasons gives us permission to enjoy the end product of their hard work. The aromatic fragrance of fresh flowers, cherry blossoms, and morning rain has always affirmed for me a new season. Even more, in this season, I always find joy, peace, and happiness. And since I am a summer baby, summer as just an extension of spring – we get to enjoy the fruits of our labor a little longer with people we love embarking on new journeys. The seasons of our lives are just like the seasons of our weather - they serve a purpose to allow us to shed some things, hibernate to rejuvenate ourselves so we can present ourselves anew, refreshed and beautifully designed to welcome laughter, joy, and love into our lives. Through this journey of healing, I am in my spring. I have cried tears of hurt, shame, embarrassment and disgust to water my garden of joy, love, and happiness. I needed to shed in the winter things and people from my life to welcome the beauty that is to come. What I have learned in this season are three things: (1) Acknowledge your feelings - I always remind myself of how busy I used to be working 50-60 hours a week, going to school full time working on a masters, and trying to be available for the students I served and the important people in my life. I never gave time to myself and to recharge. There were pains I never healed from or decisions I never fully enjoyed. I was just moving through life thinking I was happy. (2) Do not rush the process - I think about this common saying that tells us once we end one relationship, the best way to heal is to jump into another. That may work for some, but not all. To jump from a painful experience into something new, we are taking that pain with us that we never addressed. Whether it’s a new job, a new relationship, or even trying to go into a new mindset, it’s important that we take our time to process and heal. The more time we give to healing ourselves, the better we will be for the next journey and or experience. (3) Embrace the process - a few years ago I attended a Social Justice training that challenged our understandings regarding social identities. To keep us from putting our walls up when something we thought was truth was challenged, we reminded one another to trust the process. However, in a healing journey, it’s important to not only trust the process but embrace. We can trust many things and people in our lives, but do we embrace it and them to welcome them into our lives. When you embrace the process, we are welcoming healing and choosing to no longer hurt or be afraid of what’s to come. If you are in a season, I want to encourage you to fully invest in it. Acknowledge what’s taking place with you - how you are feeling, why you are feeling those feelings and decide what you will do with them. Allow yourself to shed things from your life that no longer has value (ex’s, betrayal, infidelity, job loss, childhood pain, rejection). Things will become clearer, decisions will make sense and strength will develop. Once you acknowledge your season, you will begin your journey to healing and living the life you desire and deserve. This is your Sankofa Xperience.